Are we more polarized than ever, or does this happen every time we get close to a presidential election? Probably a little bit of both. But with everyone terminally online, an ice-cold glow washing over the face of every family member sitting around the dinner table, something is definitely up. The phones aren’t just splitting us into tribes—we’re good at doing that on our own—they’re creating an endless supply of echo chambers.
Hyperpersonalization is the fourth horseman. We all used to watch the same boring TV shows, and to be honest, it kind of sucked. Then we got HBO Max and Netflix, and suddenly we had options—a filter to see which friends have the same sense of humor. TikTok took it further, handing each of us a personalized feed. Soon, AI will create tailor-made content on demand. Imagine the watercooler now:
“Hey Priya, did you catch the finale of Octopus Detective: Code Blue?”
“No, I’m still trying to finish Buzz, The Three-Legged Dog Who Could…”
“It’s actually getting a bit boring. Let me see if it’s better if he has two legs instead…” taps on screen “Hmm… LOADING… Meh, not great… Undo…”
We already have skyrocketing rates of depression and loneliness. Did you see that viral video of kids laughing and playing Halo, huddled together on a couch, which quickly progresses to each of them playing Fortnite alone with nothing but a headset in the dark? That was depressing—nothing hits like getting a triple kill and crushing Monsters with the boys. Now, imagine the kids aren’t even playing the same game online anymore; they’re all playing some generated slop that tickles their brains just the right way. They won’t even have something in common to gab about on Discord at 2 a.m. anymore. They’ll be plugged into the Matrix—except it’s an even dumber version of the Matrix where they’re each isolated in their own simulation, not even sharing the same virtual world.
Humans aren’t meant to live like this. We’re supposed to sit around, tell stories, have real conversations, argue a bit… and maybe even have sex. The internet was supposed to help us do more of that. And for a while, it did. We could share our stories with more people, meet friends we’d never have met otherwise, and learn things we never knew we needed.
But now, hyperpersonalization is making us more isolated than ever—cold and alone, with nothing but the subtle warmth of a phone battery slowly ticking to zero.
So what are we going to do? You have a choice to make: succumb and become food for the machines, or build a brighter future. If you work in tech and you’re reading this, please subscribe and then close the lid. Go to your favorite café and smile at that pretty girl across the room. Have a bite to eat. And then come back to your desk and ask yourself: Are you going to build something that celebrates our shared humanity or shatters it?